I hate electric stoves. They're so pointless. Yes, I realize they don't use gas and are better for the environment but when the power goes out, who can still cook? The gas stove owners. So unite fellow gas stove owners! We shall not fall upon the earth and bow to the barbaric electric stove owners, who walk with their noses in the air and come begging at our door the first sign of a power outage. Cook your food and eat it in front of them. Wave that pack of hotdogs in their children's faces, reminding them how unworthy they are because they chose a gas-less alternative!

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